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Wednesday, June 10th, 2009
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i'm tired of your bad energy. end it before i end it in the most violent dramatic way possible.
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, June 3rd, 2009
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eminem getting sasha baron cohen's ball in his face at mtv movie awards...
staged or not?
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Comments: Read 6 or Add Your Own.
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it's perplexing to me that not one, not two but several of my friends and acquaintances have contacted me in the last week or two and have said something to the extent of "i think my thyroid is broken too!"
i am.. not in the least bit sure how to react to any of it.
i am nervous about all of it. i was raised in an environment where medicine was never the answer. now i am on pills for the rest of my life. i don't know what parts of my life are caused and untouched by hashimoto's.
this week has been a little dreary. despite our pledges of loyalty to each other, i still know we have more common ground than the recent events. it's been talked ad nauseum, but i know you will end up in good graces again. i should have strived for a cleaner and less serrated cut. i love you for every quirk and strength you have, and i never realized how volatile my ardent desire to protect you is becoming. youre young in faith and this isnt edifying for you.
attempting to be more social these days. i adjusted to being some sort of awkward limb of travis', so i find myself wondering where he is... most nights he's somewhere else and i am the farthest thought in his mind. he isn't bad or negligent, but right now, i need to distract myself, and he can't do that for me.
the last few times i have hung out with caroline have been surprisingly fitting and serene. i'm glad she's back in my life in an active way.
i miss lani. especially now. when i hate everyone. when i just want to drive and listen to rap music too loudly. i don't have anyone to smoke cigarettes on the beach with. i can always count on her to not be high maintenance.
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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hello livejournal, old friend,
i can tell my sorrows to you.
lola chewed the couch today. i have no idea what her problem was, but i knew my dad was going to fuss at me for it.
the gomillies brought home a kitten, and it isn't in good shape. he's very lethargic, starving, and full of worms. he is eating, but his stomach is so swollen that his lil legs are bowing out.
you better believe that has been breaking my heart all day.
( Read more... )
we drive back to the gomillies. my torso only feels correct if i am sitting completely straight. to my surprise, eating helps. travis drives me home, and while i am holding the kitten i start to bawl. he is so little and never hurt anyone. travis is flabbergasted and simply puts his hand on my shoulder. that will do for now. i am lucky to have survive today with him by my side.
i show my dad the little thing, and he prays for it and feeds it. the hole in the couch goes unaccounted for. We Needed New Furniture Anyway...
i want to take a bath and finish my amy tan novel, but i left that shit at travis's house. working a 7 hour shift tomorrow. fml
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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"all you two do is sleep. seriously, natalie, whenever you come over, you two just fall asleep together. fucking lame." _ travis' sister alex
it's hilarious, because it is 100% true.
annnnyway, i am so glad i decided to take math in the summer. my tests are not only multiple choice, but they are also take-home tests. i am going to pass this class.
had a bachelorette / slumber party with leah and mikel. sad that we won't be seeing much of leah after this weekend
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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| Time: | 11:38 am. |
| Mood: |  bewildered. |
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my life has been completely turned upside down this week. apparently, my whole entire life, I've adjusted to a way of life that others don't experience.
what the hell?
I'm probably reading too much into this, but I go to the doctor's for a UTI; in the same appointment, they prescribe me a pill that i will have to take the rest of my life.
for how cavalierly the news was given out, it seems awfully final.
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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| Time: | 5:18 pm. |
| Mood: |  informed. |
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Hashimoto's Disease
i has it.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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it's that time of year again!
i needz a dog sitter for lola the 22nd through the 26th of june. she is a little more high maintenance than cleo.
preferably someone who is home more often than not.
she needs to be brushed and walked every single day.
lol sheds a shit ton of fur, hence the need for brushing. anyone who is interested might want to be wary of that.
she is a sweet little dog that loves people and other dogs. she's afraid of cats, and it's best that she not be around smaller animals. other than that, she's a sweetheart.
of course i'll be paying the volunteer. 60 for five days. thanks all!
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Comments: Read 7 or Add Your Own.
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| Time: | 9:01 pm. |
| Mood: |  pleased. | | Music: | king of the hill. |
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being productive is the most satisfying feeling. Lola is now officially registered with the American Kennel Club as a Canine Good Citizen. I am bidding good riddance to WAchovia aka walkalloverya. ANNND i just registered for my last semester at PHCC.. hopesfully.
it feels good. today was an alright day. it's rare to find something positive to say about my job, but i enjoy my co-workers very much.
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| Time: | 12:27 am. |
| Mood: |  melancholy. |
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i was so sad when i woke up alone this morning.
he was here for five hours today, and i didn't want him to leave. he told me to call him if i got scared... something you would say to a child. realistically, i'd take him up on the offer if i wasn't so damn prideful.
i'm losing my damn mind, and i'm being clingy. i hate clingy.
part of the reason we mesh so well together is we've been interdependent on each other. we have friends, and separate friends. we respect alone time. but now, i don't want him to leave. when he's here, i want him to myself. i resent his friends and list their flaws to him. this isn't me.
i recognize this is not healthy behaviour and i intend to put a stop to it. i just don't know what's come over me. i just feel like i am running out of ways to say that i appreciate him.
so i just cut myself off from him... for the time being. after five hours of him exisiting with me here, i said he should do other things than feel responsible to sit at home with me on a saturday night.
since then, i watched Vicky Cristina Barcelona and have been crying . it's not even a sad movie. i'm just tired and i have an incredibly long day ahead of me tomorrow.
moral of the story? natalie needs a vacation. i'm going to indiana
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Tuesday, April 21st, 2009
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ahh this is the fourth draft of this LJ entry. every time i sit down to inform my internetworkings, or posting for posterity's sake, it becomes an entirely too wordy rant of my chaotic schedule.
the hidden message seems to scream "GOD I AM SO BUSY SO I'M MORE SUCCESSFUL THAN YOU THEREFORE I'M BETTER THAN YOU. GOD I AM JUST TOO BUSY FOR ALL Y'ALL."
i realize this attitude usually hurts much more than helps. (i'm not sure if it would ever actually help in any circumstance?) so I will approach this calmly and do my best to leave my ego out.
i didn't want to turn into the neurotic, schedule book bitch that says " well my dear, i have a PTA meeting this day and I have to take Fluffy to the groomers this day. can i pencil/squeeze you in this day?"
let's face it. it is too late to evade it; i am THAT GUY right now.
currently, i attend school 2 days a week and i work the other five days a week. sunday through thursday i have extra-curricular activities. friday and saturday are the only two nights that i am free to do whatever i please.
( yep i'm aware how much of a yuppie dick i sound like right now )
</soapbox>
i'm a little fuzzy as to whether i am just more high-strung now, or wasting time is my newest pet peeve/i'm trying to cut out the stuff that doesn't matter to me anymore.
i'm going to guess that's it's a little of column A and a little of column B.
and of course, Russell Brand:
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Comments: Read 8 or Add Your Own.
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welp. there is something wrong with my thyroid. of course, my "doctor" told me, and she's an idiot. let's see how this one pans out.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, March 11th, 2009
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honestly, i am surprised how well lola did in her canine good citizen class. i was awful. i don't know the first thing about dog training.
sooo yeah im excited because lola and i are on our way in becoming pet therapists!
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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cynical.
